Funny Quotes and Sayings . . . you've got to laugh . . . Funny Quotes and Sayings . . . you've got to laugh . . .

       



 
Funny Quotes :
 
» HOME
» Adolescence

» Adulthood

» Adventure

» Age

» Ageing

» Anecdotes

» Animals

» Arrogance

» Beer

» Being Famous

» Bizarre

» Boasts

» Boredom

» Boys

» Bureaucracy

» Carnival

» Cartoons

» More Quotes

» Random Quotes
» Best Websites
 
Great Websites :
 

Aesop’s Fables

Christmas Jokes

College Humor

Complete Nonsense

Fairy Tales

Famous Poems

Famous Quotes

Free View Webcams

Friendship Quotes

Funny Cat Pictures

Funny Cats

Funny Jokes

Funny Pictures

Funny Poems

Funny Quotes

Ghosts

Glaswegian

Inspirational Poems

Jokes

Knock Knock Jokes

Limericks

Love Poems

Not Mensa

Photographs

Poet

Quotations Online

Riddles

Riddles Online

Duck Webcam

Strange Laws

Stupid Laws

Tongue Twisters

Weird Facts

Weird Websites

Weird

Whisky

Worst City

Worst Jokes

Worst Killers

 

funny quotes  Funny Quotes funny quotes

 

Welcome to Funny-Quotes.name We have an incredible collection of over 100,000 amazingly funny quotations that will make you laugh until you cry. There are quotes by famous people and some by lesser mortals.

We are sure you will find quotations to suit all occasions - to impress a girl, for that important wedding speech or just to amuse away some otherwise boring hours. Please take time to look around the website - and enjoy your visit to Funny Quotes.

Funny Quotes Topics - click on a topic to see the quotations

Adolescence

Adulthood

Adventure

Age

Ageing

Anecdotes

Animals

Arrogance

Beer

Being Famous

Bizarre

Boasts

Boredom

Boys

Bureaucracy

Carnival

Cartoons

Cats - 1

Cats - 2

Cats - 3

Cats - 4

Celebrity

Celibacy

Cheating

Childhood

Cleverness

Comedy

Common sense

Complaining

Complaints

Computers

Conceit

Confession

Controversy

Courtship

Cute

Cynicism

Dating

Denial

Devil

Drinking

Enemies

Envy

Epitaphs and epigrams

Etiquette

Experts

Fairies

Fanaticism

First love

Flirtation

Flirting

Fraud

Fun

Funny

Girlfriends

Girls

Going around in Circles

Grandparents

Hedonism

Human Folly

Humor

Humour

Idleness

Insults

Internet Love

Irony

Jealousy

Jokes

Kissing

Laziness

Luck

Mediocrity

Men

Men and Women

Middle Age

Misery

Nihilism

Nonsense

Old age

Pets

Pleasure

Poems

Poetry

Rhetoric

Rules

Sarcasm

Satire

Scandal

Selfishness

Sense of humor

Seriousness

Single women

Stupidity

Teenagers

The Simpsons

Winning

Women

Zeal

 
 

This weeks featured funny quotations:

Quotation Title: Cyrano De Bergerac quote on Arrogance
Quotation:
The insufferable arrogance of human beings to think that Nature was made solely for their benefit, as if it was conceivable that the sun had been set afire merely to ripen men's apples and head their cabbages.
 

Quotation Title: Homer Simpson quote on Beer
Quotation:
I'm gonna drink lots of beer and stay out all night.


Quotation Title: Confucius quote on Boredom
Quotation:
Virtuous people often revenge themselves for the constraints to which they submit by the boredom which they inspire.


Quotation Title: Ambrose Bierce quote on Cats
Quotation:
A cat is a soft, indestructible automaton provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in the domestic circle.
 

Ambrose Bierce

funny quotes



Quotation Title: Hippolyte Taine quote on Cats
Quotation:
I've met many thinkers and many cats, but the wisdom of cats is infinitely superior.


Quotation Title: Paris Hilton quote on Celebrity
Quotation:
I don't really think, I just walk.


Quotation Title: Woody Allen quote on Cheating
Quotation:
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.


Woody Allen

Woody Allen funny quotes



Quotation Title: Bill Hicks quote on Comedy
Quotation:
You believe the world's 12 thousand years old? 'That's right.' Okay I got one word to ask you, a one word question, ready? 'Uh huh.' Dinosaurs. You know the world's 12 thousand years old and dinosaurs existed, they existed in that time, you'd think it would have been mentioned in the chucking Bible at some point. 'And lo Jesus and the disciples walked to Nazareth. But the trail was blocked by a giant brontosaurus...with a splinter in his paw. And O the disciples did run a shriekin': 'What a big chucking lizard, Lord!' But Jesus was unafraid and he took the splinter from the brontosaurus's paw and the big lizard became his friend.


Quotation Title: Winnie the Pooh quote on Cute
Quotation:
A bear, however hard he tries, grows tubby without exercise.


Quotation Title: Ambrose Bierce quote on Cynicism
Quotation:
Cynic, noun: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.


Quotation Title: Oscar Wilde quote on Devil
Quotation:
We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell


Quotation Title: Oscar Wilde quote on First love
Quotation:
Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a mans last romance.


Quotation Title: Woody Allen quote on Funny
Quotation:
I'm very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.


Quotation Title: Mark Twain quote on Irony
Quotation:
I have no race prejudice. I think I have no color prejudices or caste prejudices nor creed prejudices. Indeed, I know it. I can stand any society. All that I care to know is that a man is a human being -- that is enough for me; he can't be any worse.


Quotation Title: Joe Hbuml quote on Jokes
Quotation:
If a condescending joke is truly funny, make yourself the subject- you will increase the number of people laughing by at least one.


Quotation Title: Zsa Zsa Gabor quote on Men and Women
Quotation:
I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.


Quotation Title: Brigitte Bardot quote on Middle Age
Quotation:
When you’re thirty you’re old enough to know better, but still young enough to go ahead and do it.

Brigitte Bardot
Brigitte Bardot



 

Quotation Title: Spike Milligan quote on Misery
Quotation:
Money can't buy you happiness but it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.


Quotation Title: Maggie Kuhn quote on Old age
Quotation:
Old age is an excellent time for outrage. My goal is to say or do at least one outrageous thing every week.


Quotation Title: Thomas Carlyle quote on Sarcasm
Quotation:
Sarcasm is the language of the devil, for which reason I have long since as good as renounced it


Quotation Title: Robert M. Hutchins quote on Seriousness
Quotation:
It is not so important to be serious as it is to be serious about the important things. The monkey wears an expression of seriousness which would do credit to any college student, but the monkey is serious because he itches.


Quotation Title: David Suzuki quote on Stupidity
Quotation:
We're in a giant car heading towards a brick wall and everyones arguing over where they're going to sit



 

funny quotes  Funny Quotes funny quotes

 
 
Other Stuff:
 

 

 

 
 
   
 
© Website Design Copyright 2009 by Weird-Websites.info